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Friday, October 1, 2010

Fwd: Parenting tips for working couple






Some good tips from one of the workshops on "Parenting challenges for working couple".

We know most of them but it is good to refresh them !
Please forward …

  • Feeling guilty about not spending time with kids is a –ve feeling à leads to frustration, anger and may end of showing on kid !! so don't feel guilty
  • Mapping/coaching  house maid to feed/take care of kids properly – insecurity feeling by mother/parents. Natural, but need to be flexible and watchful.
    Expectations from man about parenting have changed in modern times !!
  • No scientific evidence says children are harmed when their mothers are working ! In fact, children of working couple become more independent/grow self-esteem
  • Energizing yourself before going home (listen to music, little bit of exercise, giving up smoking, boozing) – make conscious effort !! MOST IMPORTANT
  • Free up your parents who are looking over the kids – esp on evenings/week-ends. They also need breathing space !
  • Need to be on same page (both parents) – kids should hear same message from both parents !
  • Build network in the apartment or office for support (doing !) –
  • Peer influence on –ve things (making kids emotionally strong and resistant to –ve forces from the beginning)
  • Ask for support | allow people to help | let your family do things "their way" | Learn to let go | Prioritize-better time management – U CAN DO IT !
  • Communicate, communicate, communicate with your wives
  • Divide parenting tasks (exam preparation, pick up, etc.,)
  • Parenting helps managers to manage people better at work , your management starts from home ! You become more patient and no other problems look larger than parenting
  • Spending 'time' with the kids is the wonderful 'gift' to any kids on this world ! spend quality time, no distractions (do it regularly  and consciously)
    Bribes vs. incentives – be sensitive to difference
  • Find a tutor so that you can find extra time to do some other things for kids (esp working couple)
  • Avoid sentences/words which will break their self esteem ! [ex. you always break the things !]
  • No fighting among parents in front of the kids
  • Rewarding them when they show good behavior (but don't tell them in adv – as it become bribe). This will encourage them to do more better things next time and look forward to get rewarded
  • Sharing between siblings/parents [children are very manipulating ] – be consistent with the Don't compare with other !
  • No beating as they learn as this is the way to get things done from their peers/friends. So avoid it !
  • Spend quality time 30-40 mnts as soon as you reach home and then get to your work !
  • Takes more than 1 hr time to eat – set the limit/boundaries (as children want to do it for their attention), make it smaller meals, even if it is same likable food, give it. (same thing for everyday), palak puri, graded (be creative)
  • Family that eats together stays together ! Make it a point to have at least one meal together per day !
  • Keep promises !
  • Answer the child's questions ! I started reading mahabharatha/Ramayana becos of kids as I need to feed the info
  • Surrounded their env with books, toys, sports –
  • Play with them and engage with them in some hobbies ! This is the best way to teach many things ! All the work and no play makes jack a dull boy !
  • Be passionate and positive about parenting !! Ignite them for better future !

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